Archive for March 16th, 2010

Denim, Jeans, and Dungarees: The Manliest of Fabrics!!

So you think you’re a Man huh? I guess the only thing to do is ask yourself 3 questions:

  1. Have you held on tight to your fellow brother-in-arms as you’ve cruised down the vast stretches of American highway with the sweet tune of a motorcycle engine shredding your ears?!

  2. Have you ever been worn down to a faded version of your former self due to rubbing against a leather saddle as you and your wingman rope in little doggies on the open planes of the wild west?!

  3. Have you ever been studded with metal spikes and strutted across a stage like a proud peacock in front of thousands of lustful lady-fans while teased aqua net hair graces your shoulders?!

You probably answered “No” to every one of these because you are a wuss-pie.

That…and because you’re not made of the manliest fabric in the entire universe: Denim!

Today we salute the most popular fabric that makes up the unabashed manliness adorning humanity’s casual dress code.

Denim proudly boasts the most popular and durable fabric ever made! Its powerful cotton twill textile screams at every rugged challenge, “Kiss my ass! I’ve been around since the 17th Century, and I ain’t goin’ NO WHERE!!!”

From Mom’s sporting over-the-belly-button Faded Glories to our ax-wielding super heroes known as Lumberjacks, Mr. Indigo binds the world together through fashion and durability guaranteeing ultimate comfort without losing its Y chromosome.

Denim is so manly that even when other puny “trousers” have to be trashed due to a squatting incident or because you used your knees as skis while attached to a moving pick-up truck in some bizarre courting ritual, it wears its destruction proudly. In a brazen bout of man-thinking, Denim even sports its tattered remains as a fashion-forward statement of style. Man, that’s manly!

By now you’re probably asking yourself 2 new questions:

  1. How can a fabric be so cool?!
  2. How can I be as cool as Denim?

Answers:

1. When you’re so awesome that you primarily come in one color then make that color Blue (the most male-related hue there is) maybe then you’ll have an understanding of how macho denim can be.

2. When a jean company gives you a catch phrase like “Can’t Bust’em” then maybe you too can be as rough, tough, and badass as Denim Jeans.

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03 2010